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Why Some of Us Long for Love, But Don’t Trust It – Exploring Disorganised Attachment
“Come close… but don’t.” Disorganised attachment forms in childhood when the person you most rely on for safety is also the source of fear. This creates a devastating conflict: the child’s natural instinct is to seek comfort from their parent, yet the parent’s...
Why Some of Us Can’t Trust: Ambivalent Attachment
“It doesn’t matter how much they tell me they love me, or how much I trust they won’t leave me for someone else, it’s just so hard to believe them”. This is another common theme in the therapy room. Ambivalent attachment develops in childhood when a parent is...
Why Some of Us Value Independence: Understanding Avoidant Attachment
“My childhood was fine. I always had food, clothes, and I got taken to after-school activities. I don’t know why I struggle so much now”. Variations of this statement are really common in the therapy room. On the surface, everything looked great. But often, something...
What Secure Attachment Really Means
What Secure Attachment Really Means Imagine being in relationships with others – and having a sense that you belong, that you’re safe, and that someone has your back. That ease and deep-down sense of well-being is what secure attachment feels like. Attachment styles...
Were you ever told that you’re too sensitive, too emotional, or too much?
Sensitivity, or being emotional, is not a problem. It’s just another temperament type that, if someone has it, needs to be nurtured and encouraged so their strengths can shine. Unfortunately, though, we live in a culture that rewards emotional suppression and...
6 Ways Trauma Might Be Showing Up in Your Life Without You Realising It
Trauma symptoms and behaviour often look nothing like the original trauma, so it can be very hard to know they are directly connected, even when you know what your trauma was. When you are unsure if you have experienced trauma, but have a whole lot of distressing...
The Beauty of Trauma Therapy
One of the greatest privileges of my work is to watch people come home to themselves. I feel so lucky to have discovered the particular type of trauma therapy approach I use in practice. I want to share with you how I've seen trauma therapy transform some of my...
Why Logic, CBT, and Strategies Don’t Always Work When Trauma Lives in the Body
“I know it’s irrational. So why can’t I stop feeling this way?” I hear so many of my clients say this in exasperation. They’ve tried to change their thoughts and their beliefs, they’ve tried all the strategies, they’ve read lots of books, they’ve tried to stay...
Are you still hurting? Why the traditional approaches to mental health might not be enough
If you’ve spent years trying to understand and heal your pain, and you’re still hurting, you’re not alone. You’ve done what you were told would help: seen the doctors, taken the medication, changed your thinking, learned to cope—maybe even tried therapy. You might...
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If you're struggling with complex trauma, don't face it alone. Contact me today and start your journey to trauma recovery.